If I’ve learned one thing while playing Microsoft® Train Simulator, it’s that while driving Amtrak’s Acela Express, you can’t brake or accelerate enough to knock over a card table balanced on the head of a pin without having “jostled the passengers beyond acceptable limits.”

You can go from 85 kph to a complete stop in less than five seconds without the riders of the Tokyo commuter rail line blinking an eye. The passengers on the Acela route would probably come out of the computer and sue if I tried that on them. I am ashamed of my country today.